| Updating n Playa Hatin ,I saw Danny. |
[Monday June 6th 2005 / 10:19am] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
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music |
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MCR |
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The past few days few being like 12 maybe 16 have been random.
Prom was a waste of 80 bux but after party was well worth it.Drinking really is something Im over.I liked it 2 years ago but now that I dont really do it when I do I always end up feeling shitty.My Prom Dress was amazing...Id wear it everyday if I could.Ive been doing a lit bit of hanging out.No more week nights.Im still at All Nite Starbucks every damn weekend.Im addicted.
Ive decided that Im being used by u know who so Im going to call it off!No more slavery.I saw Spyder,he was hours late but it wasnt his fault.It was good seeing him, he doesnt understand how cool it was just to sit around with him,hes amusing and makes me smile.I missed him lots and lots.Peter came with him, that guys a chiller we sat at starbucks n chit chatted.I chilled with Phillis.Ive been talking to this guy Spence that I met at Justines house. This past weekend we talked on the phone for at least 15 hours about everything.Its weird talking to someone (a guy) on the phone for that long because the last person I did that with I was in love with and havent talked to in a while.Sad.Its kool though Spence is kind of in the same situation so we shared a lot of advice on sensitive subjects and laughed it off talking about food and random acts of hyper attacks,condoms,pot,movies,bands and everything else....New friend...I think so!
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| IVE DECIDED |
[Wednesday May 25th 2005 / 10:42am] |
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mood |
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 content |
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music |
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Femmes |
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THIS WEEKENDS GOING TO BE THE OWN
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| HAH |
[Thursday May 19th 2005 / 9:49am] |
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mood |
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Tickled by the word Bust |
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music |
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Look What I did |
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I love Guys that say "Im about to Bust"WTF .lol
"Can I bust On you tits"
Fuck No U cant cuz U used the word"Bust"
Not that this was said to me.
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| DAMN GRLLLL LEMMEY GET THOSE DIGITS |
[Tuesday May 17th 2005 / 12:52pm] |
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mood |
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Pretty much the same |
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music |
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AFI |
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NEW CELLEY 818.284.7440
1 2 4 CALL ME MORE !!!!!!!
After 9 on weekdays all the tizime on weekends
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| And so on and so on |
[Tuesday May 17th 2005 / 12:29pm] |
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mood |
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mellow |
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music |
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AFI |
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So he came 5 times and so on and so on
So She cried and lied again, I sat there and listened and so on and so on
I got home late again and so on and so on
I continue to write letters Ill never send and so on and so on
Drugs will supply and escape for the guys and so on and so on
They'll make me laugh and Ill clean thier apartment and so on and so on
He'll continue to deny his feelings and so on and so on
Ill keep loving others and laughing with friends over coffee and smokes and so on and so on
Ill never be someones someone and thats fine,I still love life and cheap thrills and so on and so on
The words fly out meaning-less-ly,the important ones will stay in my mind spinning in time and-so-on-and-so...
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| AGHHHHH |
[Thursday May 12th 2005 / 1:25pm] |
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mood |
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 and annoyed with bleeding |
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music |
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Some Hardcore crap |
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FUCKIN PAIN IN MY BABY MAKERS!!!! I WANT TO STAB MY OVARIES WITH A VERY SHARP KNIFE!!!!I DONT WANT KIDS......WHY THE FUCKIN CURSE OF THE CUNT!!!!!!
My cramps are killing 3 profin 2 Advil 800 with coding and 1 fuckin Intense Pain killer from Moms dresser and NO FUCKIN PAIN RELIEF.
OWWWWWWWWYYYYYYY mother fuckin PMS
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| Im bleeding |
[Thursday May 12th 2005 / 12:33am] |
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mood |
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 groggy |
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music |
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bright eyes |
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I puked all over Beverly Hills the other day.I puked in front of a rich white lady who looked at me with disgust. SHE CAN SUCK MY INVISIBLE 8 INCH COCK.
Im not going to Prom with a date the person I wanted to take told me to "Have a nice life"
the back up plans a Hot stoner and well no one else would spend 80 bucks to haveto put up with my shit all nite.
Im a bitch,but sum people love me.
I miss my body fat I weight 24 lbs less then I did 2 months ago.
I want someone to come over and watch discovery chanel dvds with me
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| Boys will play Songs and I'll Listen |
[Tuesday May 10th 2005 / 5:17pm] |
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mood |
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 creative |
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music |
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Rufio |
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SInce Im such a heart-breaker,careless playa A few guys have played songs to express how they feel heres a list of some of those songs
Bright Eyes- The Calender Hung Itself
Ok Go- Get Over It
TBS - Tour Own Disaster "Hey lush Have fun its the weekend"
Jet - Cold HArd Bitch .....HArsh But true
POM- She Fuckin HATES ME....I Dont hate anyone
MY PERSONAL FAVORITE
Jack Johnson
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing
I was sitting, waiting, wishing
You believed in superstitions
Then maybe you would see the signs
But lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain’t the lord no I’m just a fool
Learning loving somebody
Don’t make them love you
Must I always be waiting, waiting on you?
Must I always be playing, playing your fool?
I sang your songs I danced your dance
I gave your friends all a chance
But putting up with them
Wasn’t worth never having you
Maybe you’ve been through this before
But it’s my first time so please ignore
The next few lines because they’re directed at you
I can’t always be waiting, waiting on you
I can’t always be playing, playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But it’s not my scene
Want this plot to twist
I’ve had enough mystery
You keep building it up
But then you’re shooting me down
But I’m already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting
Well if I was in your position
I’d put down all my ammunition
I’d wonder why it had taken me so long
But lord knows that I’m not you
And if I was I wouldn’t be so cruel
Because waiting on love
Ain’t so easy to do
Must I always be waiting, waiting on you?
Must I always be playing, playing your fool?
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| A thought ...An Emo Thought |
[Friday May 6th 2005 / 5:42pm] |
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mood |
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drained |
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music |
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Since Youve Been Gone |
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I waited and I waited and he never called, even after we talked and I cried and I told him how I felt.It didnt make a difference.Why cant he call me. I hope he's happy now.Now that we're even,Now that Ive told him what he'd wanted to hear.He knows now that Im alone.I hoped that my call would make a difference, but I mean nothing now,a friendship,a love ,a part of me has drifted.
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| LOOOONG ASS Weekend |
[Monday April 25th 2005 / 10:57am] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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ZAC Hexum |
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Holla holla holla,
This past weekend started on a Thursday, I say this becuz I didnt go home after skool I just went straight to the partying a day early.
Thursaday I went to Brock,Grant, and Ryans with Tiffany she made me Starbucks it was Yummm then ...I dont remember but somehow I ended up with Stephanie,Liz,Granty and Jess and we all went to Stephs and then to THE HOUSE OF BLUES to see Zac play.I sat in the VIP room happy as fuck becuz Zacs music is amazing and Im 17 sitting in the VIP room getting drunk.Woo hoo,After that we ordered Mels and then We sat in the hot tub.AT around 3:30 am I had Steph take me back to the valley.I went back to Grants cuddled and sleept for like an hour....later on that day
(Friday) I said fuck skool and decided to chill with the guys.Hours past I left Tiff Tiff with the boys to go chill around the valley with JESS we met up with Malka,Mark and Natty got sum good ass food and then I Finally at like 2 I went home.
Saturday morning I woke up and cleaned my room and got ready to go to the fair with Steph. We met up with Ben and his kid it was fun kid stuff,After wards went to Stephs changed clothes and cruized the valley.Hit up the all nite Starbucks,smoked lots of Fags and then went to Jessez where Noele her roomate, was throwing a party full of hot rockstar men over 30.I fell in love with one named Gabe.Le sigh.Justine and Landon showed up,I got tipsy.Then really emotional and went downstairs to wine and chill with the boys chatted went back upstairs, at 345 Steph and I were ready to leave we drove home and talked about serious shit and then she passed out and I was up till 7 on myspace.Steph and I woke up watched cartoons and then went to the movies to see The Interpritbsdfbf IT SUCKed dont see it.
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| ANd thEn and that |
[Friday April 15th 2005 / 9:43am] |
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mood |
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 good |
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music |
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the sounds in my head |
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I lost about 10 pounds in 3 weeks
I told John the awful truth
I partied like a rockstar with my friends everynite for 2 weeks.
I DITCHED SKOOL YESTURDAY TO GO TO SIX FLAGS AND RODE EVERY DAMN RIDE
I realized boys will always think with their weeners
I have a crush on Luke
Im going to miss Jess
I love gay men,Ryan the most,how fabulous is he!!! G'z
Everyone at skool thinks Im on drugs
I should have never cut my hair
Im in love with Josh,Lizy,Ryan,Cam,Colin,Wez the whole damn starbucks crew.
I am getting a weave for prom!
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| But now.... |
[Sunday March 27th 2005 / 12:51pm] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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music |
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Jet"Look what you've done" |
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I thought I was Happy then but now...
Im glowing
Ive never been so happy with my life and the people that are in it.I have learned so much about myself and others in the past few months.Life doesnt really get much better then hanging out with amazing people all week long every week.People that honestly care and have this amazing positive energy.No one talks shit,even when others arent around.We all just feed off of the positive energy. We go out for coffee,chill and eat good food,sometimes the ganj is smoked,sometimes a drink is passed but no one ever gets to fucked up and no one ever feels the need to be anything but happy.Finally a group of people that dont like drama a group of people I fit into and want to know for a long time.(PS homies,and the Rocky not included,u guys know I love u always).Im so happy I met you guys.
Love You Guys Lots
Tiff Tiff,Sean,
Jess,Josh,Lizzy Izzy,
Wes (my other half)
Alli,Grant,Brock
Ryan,Kyle,Memerrs.
Ive met so many amazing people and have rebuilt so many friendships.Everyday Im with my crew is like my birthday.Lovin life like whoa.
SEE YA"LL TONITE AT THE HIZOUSE,IM BRINGING CAKE.
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| hmmm |
[Friday March 18th 2005 / 9:06am] |
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mood |
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 blah |
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music |
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The killers |
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*Past few weeks have been great,hanging out with the friends,going to all the good shows.
*Smoked way to many fags so now I have a sore throat from hell.
*I miss John-a-bear
*I got stuck in an elevator during the Blackout in LA(that was lame)
*Im hungry but cant bring myself to eat
*Im lonely but cant kiss another guy I dont care about
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| Its good |
[Friday February 25th 2005 / 9:37am] |
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mood |
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and giddy |
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music |
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The Used "Hard to say" |
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To have amazing friends
stay out late
eat sushi
Listen to The Shins and The Used all week long
kiss someone hot every few days (Id say who but u might take him)
smoke fags with rocky,phillip and jessica
hang out on sunset
miss people (Im not the ice queen after all)
vintage shop till you drop
Its good to be me!
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| Lifes Good and Getting better |
[Saturday February 19th 2005 / 4:10am] |
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mood |
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 and loved |
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music |
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The Shins |
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Im at justines had a great nite meeting her new boyfriend hes AMAZING,Met her friend Liz who also rocks ,Met this girl Jessica chilled with Landon as well He picked me up in the poorin rain.Tonight was really good fun I love meeting new people .Its been a while but heres and update
*Not getting kicked out of LACHSA
*Hooking up with a sex god(hes a chiller)
*looking foward 2 sum good shows coming up
*lovin the life out of Rocky,Phillip,John,Izzy,D-izzle,my new friend Tiffany,LAndon,JustineAshley and Im sure I forgot a few but I LOVE THEM HO"S TO DEATH!
*Ive been learning about myself
*Keeping kool with mom
*Not doing shit in skool I have 2 classes!
*Kickin back filling each day with good music,a positive attitude and shits and giggles.
Livin better then Paris Hilton.
BEST SONG EVER/SONG OF THE WEEK
Artist: The Shins
Album: Chutes Too Narrow
Title: Kissing The Lipless
Called to see if your back
Was still aligned and your sheets
Were growing grass all on the corners of your bed
But you've got too much to wear on your sleeves
It has too much to do with me
And secretly I want to bury in the yard
The grey remains of a friendship scarred
You told us of your new life there
You got someone comin' around
Gluing tinsel to your crown
He's got you talking pretty loud
You berate remember your ailing heart and your criminal eyes
You say you're still in love
If it's true what can be done
It's hard to leave all those moments behind
You tested your metal of doe's skin and petals
While kissing the lipless
Who bleed all the sweetness away
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| kill it |
[Wednesday February 2nd 2005 / 10:56am] |
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mood |
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 and fed up with 5th grade shit |
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music |
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Glassjaw |
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Kill it
Im sick of
weak people
not escaping anger
constant lonliness
being scared of strangers
fakes(u fuckin know who u are)
Bitches in the valley that talk behind eachothers backs and smile when the see eachother at the fuckin galleria. SMILE for the shallow camera.
Dont take any shit from anyone Nicole your better then that,ur better then kissing ass u need to find someone to kiss yours,its ur turn to feel good about urself. You know this stop being abused already,Scars from people who have cut you up dont look good on ur white skin.Dont take any shit from anyone Dora your fuckin beautiful wake up and smell the fuckin coffee people love you,u make people insane.Your making urself insane.Your pretty ur smart you the only thing left for you to do is be yourself you dont need to make new friends you need to become friends with yourself,I've told you thins.Your life isnt bad,uve got it soo good.
Think harder everyone, theres this huge ass world outside of high skool,theres a huge world outside of college.Do u want to be remembered ,do you want to regret anything,do you want to be something tick fuckin tock.I dont think u understand.I dont want to give a fuck anymore . Fuck the drama.Lets all stop being so fuckin bipolar with our emotions we only have this one live to live thats it.This is the one we have.Case fuckin closed.
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| AT SKOOL |
[Tuesday February 1st 2005 / 11:25am] |
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mood |
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 and tired |
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music |
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The Used"All that Ive got" |
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Im at skool right now and Im so flippin tired.
Blah.
I feel so lonely I wish I would have never cuddled with that sexy son of a bitch saturday nite becuz now I miss feeling like I have someone.
I hate feelings thier so confusing and annoying......I cant wait for my Grunge Prince in tatted armer.
"Close my eyes let the whole thing pass me by,there is no time to waste asking why"
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| BEST WEEKEND EVER |
[Sunday January 30th 2005 / 2:33pm] |
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mood |
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 and happy as hell |
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music |
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The Crazy Mix |
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This weekend was FUCKIN BAD ASS
Friday:
Met up with Askley G after school,And we caught up on shit and the went to the Cobalt, the minute I got there I saw everyone,All the people Ive been missing.It was fuckin wicked!
I started talking to the bassist of this band from Las Vegas,He was so cute,what a sweetie we talked for about an hour(I got his number) and then I met these two run-a-way punks and I acted crazy with them all nite, we ate stolen bread,brushed our teeth right there on the spit and just acted stupid.I went on a walk with Barry and Talked to skeet about his adventures on tour.I talked to people that I hadnt seen in forever.I was having so much fun.It was like one big party.maybe even my own birthday party.
Saturday:
I sleept untill about 2 and then went to Ashley P's we went to the cobalt to see Skin Flick, It was kool the SF crew was there.We had a good fuckin time running around going in and out of the Cobalt.We got dinner with Ryan that shit was good.
After that
Crystal,Ashley,Bianca,Mike and I went to this Russian Party in the valley,I wasnt that into it Im not a vodka chk. Ashley and I got home and then WE BUSTED A FUCKIN MISSION OVER THE HILL TO SUNSET AT 2 IN THE MORNING to meet up with this guy Jimmy that I met on myspace.FUck that guy was SOOO Hot, we watched a little bite of Mean Girls and Dawn of the Dead,nothing went down cept for cuddles, Im not a myspace whore,But he was really kool,Ill most likely chill with him later this week.We got home at 4 and ashley and I talked about random shit."How many bad kissers have u kiss",future plans, blah blah blah!!!
Today
Im still w/ Ashley we just got back from a Bomb Ass Breakfast.
I might be getting kicked out of skool so I better live that shit up today!
2 hours later
Talked to my cutie from last nixite,crush....
Went with MArie Ashley Nikole Hersh n sum kool chk watched them smoke on a roof,how fun!
pics to come
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| LIfe still has its good times |
[Friday January 21st 2005 / 7:57pm] |
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mood |
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 and semi sleepy |
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music |
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Glassjaw |
] |
Everything was shit about 5 days ago but everthings getting a lot better.
Ill keep this update brief.
I got rid of a bunch of people that I thought were bull shit friends.
Becky Russ is my hero.
I love my part in the skool play,my costume kicks so much ass,I already got it.
Boys are still on my mind...myspace crushes arent that bad.
I can finally talk to a hot guy when I see one...Its really not that scary.
Im cutting my hair for real on sunday.
I love Melrose,Phillip and I went today,I love Phillip 2.BFF lol
I dont think Im getting kicked out of skool anymore.
Magan Berritt is THE FUNNIEST GIRL EVER!
Allison dunn is a better person then I.Im so childish.
Tomorrow I take SATS..agggghhh at least Im going shopping afterwards.
My new fav band is Guster ,their just so good.
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| Randomness |
[Wednesday January 12th 2005 / 10:30am] |
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mood |
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and anxious |
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music |
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Garden State Soundtrack "Caring is Creepy" |
] |
So when I got back from New York shit was getting so bad,I wanted to slit my wrist in a dark corner and cry while the blood drained from my body and flowed onto the floor.Instead of doing that Ive decided to just crack down on my bad habbits and change the way I live my so called life.(hah made u think of the show didnt I????)Its working Im turning in skool work,avoiding negativity,working out,not looking so hard for that special someone to look me in the eyes and tell me I mean the world to them. I could honestly care less about that right now.One thing I have yet to stop doing is STALKING COLLEGE BOYS ON CAMPUS,its an addiction and Martin and Mitchel are way to hot not to follow around.
*Last weekend was Doras Party.It was good fucking times.
*I saw Daniel,that was pretty sweet.
*This week Has been laid back,I watched Garden State during skool hours, that was exciting.
*I went man stalking with Leslie,that girl can stalk a man down!
*This upcoming weekend is a 4 day weekend,so far I know Im going to Rockys house(YAY)and Im seening Landon (double YAY)
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